Why Is Emotional Healing So Hard?
One main reason emotions seem so difficult to work with is because of this double-whammy: we tend to focus on the events of the past while ignoring the thoughts and feelings that keep those events alive in our hearts and minds.
We consciously choose to elevate certain (perhaps many) painful events of the past until they practically sit at The Right Hand Of God.
We exaggerate their importance while at the same time we refuse to feel, express and release the emotional impact they created.
It takes constant effort to keep the past alive. You can’t just set it and forget it – like a thermostat on the wall You have to keep remembering it.
You have to keep using today’s power to reinforce the imprisonment of yesterday’s power.
We Invest In The Past
The past is over, yet our power remains trapped in the emotional investment we’ve made in certain painful events of that dead past.
The past is over.
As you read these words, most likely your parents are not standing there twisting your arms behind your back. Most likely, your ex is not beating you up between paragraphs.
The past is over.
But the very power we need to break free from those memories is instead being diverted into a much more sinister goal. We invest a lot of time and energy creating a Frankenstein’s monster of the past, and it’s become too big to handle.
The power you need to heal the past is instead being used to try to keep it alive. It’s become a tangled mess.
You can’t heal the past until you get more power.
You can’t get more power until you heal the past.
This is one reason emotional healing can seem so difficult.
So what’s the answer?
First you heal a little bit, and you retrieve a little power. Then, in your empowered state you heal a little more and get back a little more power.
It happens layer by layer.
With greater power comes greater healing.
With greater healing comes greater power.
To help you heal and retrieve your power from the past, you need to forgive yourself.
It took a long time for me to figure this one out.
I used to be so stubborn; holding onto so much emotional garbage. What a waste.
Forgiving yourself is like walking out of a prison.
Plus, it’s an elegant way to make a change in your life. When you forgive yourself – truly forgive yourself, change is almost automatic.
Sometimes all I can do is marvel at the possibilities that have suddenly opened up for me.
And sometimes I just want to sit quietly and let things settle inside. Because my mind has been blown apart…
Thanks to Mark Myhre for this excerpt